MUTE

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Sometimes, I wish I could scream my head off
I wish I could rise to my defense
And justify myself before my accusers
But you, O lord has forbidden me
And you said you will rise to my rescue.
How much longer do I have to wait?
How much longer do I have to be the villain?
How much longer do I have to watch as everything is stripped from me

I shake my head at the wonders before me
And the decisions being made as a reaction
Especially as I haven't said anything to soothe any ego
Or risen to defend all the accusations.
Am I not human? Have I no feelings?
Yet all I can do is watch and cry as you allow all that I have loved to be taken away.
Still I am learning to trust in you.
If I shouldn't talk, then maybe you will fight for me.
If it is taken away, maybe it never was mine to have.
If it never ceases to look at me through your eyes,
Then perhaps, it has another set of eyes it operates by.
If it won't listen to you....then maybe what it hears will help make its home.

Lord, this is taking too long.
When will I be justified?
When will the truth be known?
I know I'm horrible. ...but I always have been
And that's why it's easy to rest on your mercies.
Lord, help me.
Give me strength
Give me all I would need to be beautiful
In both your sight and in the eyes of men.

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