how do i get detangled emotionally?

The answer is pretty simple. First admit that you are entangled. Then be true to yourself that you can't help yourself. Naturally as humans, we tend to lie to ourselves that it's not so bad. And then we continue by telling ourselves we can handle it....until it becomes the story on everyone's lips and can't be hidden any longer. Shame sets in....and things get ugly but why wait till it gets so bad?

Get friends or wise people that can help stand between you and the one you are entangled with. It may take some time to purge yourself of the person but hey, who is rushing?

Love, Lust or any emotional entanglement for that matter, has a funny way of latching onto the heart and not letting go easily. Tell me about it and I will be more than happy to let you know that I’ve been there. So don't give me that crap about not being able to do anything about it. That is so not true. If you hear that the person has some kind of contagious disease, won't the love sickness clear from your eyes? Well, maybe that's too extreme but everyone has his/her breaking point or elastic limit.

Now let’s get to the bottom of the matter.

I hear that it’s pretty difficult to get out of a relationship once you are emotionally entangled. Yea. It’s true. Emotions are not easily controllable when some hot attraction things are going on. All you want to do when you set eyes on the person is just to love and be loved right back…nothing more…and you do well to just bask in it all.

Someone once told me that it is very hard to just tell someone to quit having an affair if I do not know the techniques the person should employ. I shouldn’t just think it is easy to stop having an affair if I have never been in those shoes. Well, I couldn’t agree more. How can you be a leader without first being a servant to others? How can you know how to love if you have never received love? If these statements are true, then, I really may not be able to say much if I have never had an affair or had some form of escapade of my own or at least seen one up close that it became personal. LOL.

The affair with Mai was hot, wild, and sweet while it lasted…and it went on for more than a couple of months. But then, I knew it just had to stop because it wasn't something i would proudly tell my parents or even my friends. My conscience was getting the best of me but the interesting part was that I had no idea how to stop.

Immediately I set my eyes on him, the butterflies in my belly make my tongue lock and my words just don’t come out right.  And the next thing I know, I’m hugging and kissing the guy. I knew I needed help and I needed it fast.

Firstly, i had to find a way to tell some friends what was going on. I knew they'd be disappointed but i also knew they could help.

My remedy was to seek the help of close friends who were mature and wise….i told them all that was going on and they rose to my rescue. That was how i respected the place of friends. They told me what to do and encouraged me to approach him with certain words. Trust me, even at the time i sounded crazy but i was so desperate. I know i make it all sound so easy but at the time, it wasn’t.

They had to take me through some sort of therapy to work on my speech and even my mindset that i couldnt do it to break me. They practically taught me the words to say and how to say them. And then, thrust me at the guy when they thought I was ready.

I didn't think I was in any way ready in any way.
And it worked. And then I was taken out of the vicinity in order that I could heal and find closure while focussing on other important things.