Silent Lord.

-
At the crossroad,
A yes or no would do...
But it just has to be difficult for me,
You just had to be silent over this matter.
I have cried many times
To the Lord who knows all
And is all....
And yet,he stays mute.

What do I do that I haven't done?
I've got my fears....but they aren't excuses
They are just reasons that have drawn the borders of our relationship
My haven is cracking
And I'm scared,
Yet my heart's opened up to bigger possibilities
And Lord knows I hate what it's doing to you too.
But I'm helpless here,clueless even.
But why Lord are you still?

I'm bowed.
I have no words...
I miss my 'friend'
As I have for the many years we have been.
Yet wait I must.
Not wound an already hurting heart.

If ever I wanted to play games,
In the wide open field,
I could have...but that me is dead
Along with the season.
I have nothing in me that can do that.

Remember many seasons ago,
You all played this game but me.
I was the 'labelled' for not understanding the rules of the game.
You accuse me thoughtlessly,
Yet think deeply and be true
In the face of your hurt,
The me I have become cannot gloat.
And silly as this may sound,
I'm hurting too...

Much as i could have embraced it,
Again,you make me bleed.
But I trust as always....
Somehow, and at some time, it will all make sense.

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