My Perfect Mask

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On my own
Smokescreen in place,
My perfect mask
My defense and my shield.
Everything in me will naturally fight you
And latch on to the only thing I know that's true
Just because I need to protect myself
From those who eat off you 
For personal gain, 
Alone, Never for the love of me.

Though it is the same story,
I dared to surrender
To this aloneness,
Even though you seem to be here
Just like you, a part of me registers it as all others
As a 'just for now' zeal.
But I hope to be wrong. I wait....
Unmasked.
Not for you, but me.
With no boundaries.
Like tazer to my heart
To the door of my innermost chambers of insecurities
And of a hidden fear.
If you as much as knocked, I would have dared to open.
But I will not give you that on a platter.
It is earned.
So I return to my cocoon
And await the unlikely.




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