Access Denied

-
I know I said this
And did that
And I know that I did what I should
As the Lord asked of me
But the human in me struggles
And my emotions are a raging mess
Oh heart, quiet down. Be still...
Yet my heart is stayed on you.
I keep checking to read from you
And I'm not over your display picture.
The attraction I feel is vivid and sharp,
And definitely not something I'm used to,
If at all, maybe twice....
And this is one of them...
Yet you messed up and the password changed.
Your access is denied.

I was scared.
But that was then.
If the hold wasn't broken
I'd have picked fights just to run away from this feeling.
Or be thrown into another whirlwind of trouble.
But I am grateful you are a "messer upper"
Now I'm free to fly.
Liberated, I see the wiles.
My heart dances to new rhythm
And a new tag line emerges
Unlicensed users not welcome.
Access denied.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Can I see the war?

-
There's a war out there that doesn't care about my feelings or struggles.  It is a war.  Its aim is to destroy. Frodo and company were chosen irrespective of their grievances.  They had to put sentiments and grievances aside to fight a common enemy. The key is together. An agreement. A fellowship. The Body Else the purpose of the company is lost; and we be earthly praised but eternally useless. We must never forget that our fellowship was beyond us;  but divinely orchestrated for a purpose.  That should be enough for me. Again, The key is together. An agreement. A fellowship. The Body Else, the purpose of the company is lost; and we be earthly praised but eternally useless.
Read more

THE BEAST IN EVERY MAN

-
The beast is in every man All it waits for is an opportunity to present itself And the other side is manifested. It's so easily suppressed when opportunity is far Yet easy to point at another and criticize When his own opportunity is near. But time and chance happens to every man. What is in man will be made manifest. I have made this mistake far too many times. You have insulted me far more than anyone I have known. I can point to your speck because I have conquered my log. I have seen the beast in me and it is easy to recognize in another, even if suppressed. It is the way. The only way. It is the way of love. It is the way of empathy. It is the place of wisdom. It is never the place for knowledge. Knowledge still has a lot to learn without knowing it does.  Knowledge is light that has not become one with you. It is selfish. It puffs up. It thinks its way is the way things should be done. This is why it will always think it knows, and seeks for the praise of man...
Read more

The longest 2 weeks

-
20/10/2020 The date many will not forget in a while. A very significant date to many youths in Nigeria.  That was the day I put to bed. In the midst of that chaos, I had my own personal crisis. I had a c-section. And it was successful. I had my husband with me through the surgery.... I heard your voice telling me to stay awake. You said it repeatedly, "Babe. Please stay awake for me. I beg you. Please don't go to sleep". And you held my hand and soothed my forehead just to keep me calm. And it was all I needed at that time....or so I thought until I saw the tiny being that was just extracted from my belly, wrapped up in a green cloth and screaming at the top of his lungs. Then, I knew there was always room for more. All I felt at that instant was love and gratitude.  The wait to reconnect with you and the baby was a totally different process.  And then not being able to move for almost a whole day didn't make it any easier. Little did I know what was to come.  There ...
Read more