Olúwafèyíṣarámi

That moment when all becomes awkward And all that darkness is supposed to cover Becomes infused with light. I'm sure you know what I am on about Because it has happened to you before or even to someone you know. Like the Yoruba adage says: "those things that we do not want the father to hear, will eventually be settled by him." meaning, those things that you think are secret, many people who know you would rather hush and look on in amusement at your folly and the eyes that see into the darkness laughs in wait... until that moment when you see that you do need help. that's what i am talking about; that moment when the hunter becomes the haunted. walking hand-in-hand  on the streets with unfamiliar eyes; locking lips where there are no tongues to wag; being crazy just because there is no one to be the alarm, going down the mountain when one should be ascending. our fears keep us locked up in things that would draw us perpetually down rather than lift...

These are the questions that plague my mind as i sit on my bed, facing the window. I look back at my friends, these ones that are closer to me than family; I realize that many of our decisions have been made out of reaction to something done to the self. an offense that has borne many fruits. pride...and then, we totally forget about order, even though we preach it and point to it. We have fought these wars for so long and have screamed these words so loud that we cannot deny that we never heard them. but why really do we fight? why have these fights gone on for so long? why do we have something to say about what you did, say or didn't do to 'me'? why should it not be done to u? if really i claim to understand that these are tests to mould me into maturity or else screen me out as a babe, then why the wars? who really are we fighting with? with whom do i contend? All we want and everything we have claimed to be our utmost desire is that this whole thing be pushed fur...

the silent war continues subtly eating away at the bonds we had built over the years we may stick it all inside that unimportant box but the truth is that it shapes our every decision. or not but it does have some impact on the mind. for the sake of peace, a tomorrow's peace, i will fight this war today. i will do all i can to gain you back and put you where exactly you should be. you may hate me for it but deja vu i see it like it happened all those years ago with my eyes open, i won't go through these motions all over again. it is over the war within has ended thanks to you and to the stunts that opened my eyes now, the fight is without. it must manifest from the inside out. it is time. knock, knock! tomorrow is almost here.

Day by day It seems more like all is well But the more i realize the great war in between. it gets clearer by the day that i can never trust that which my eyes see. Man, our hearts so desperately wicked And not only that but we all will do everything that will put us in the good books. The war between us rages The smiles and affections deepen, but the heart goes sour. and the spirit gets estranged the more. The reason behind our decisions may seem salient but it screams volumes In all that we breathe. here we are again the wickedness in our hearts acting out another drama a reminder of the past that stabbed all trust in its core. it is the same thing. nothing more, nothing less. and here i am i feel my heart closing in now, i am certain that there is no way there but the fogs will only get thicker still. i refuse to go there i refuse to relive my past in its foolishness. day by day, i must strive harder toward wisdom. nothing less does my he...

Angels walking, crawling and fying All shapes, sizes and forms Seen but undetected working for the unsuspecting people around Digging deep into the heart moulding the real being Bringing uplifting the person. An angel A guardian A friend seen and unseen But out to work on you and see you through the journey of your real mission on earth till you get there till you see as you should in the mirror till you become that which you ave seen you are not alone

day by day, i am being humbled by the realization that the most important thing is that thing that keyed me to the father at the very beginning and how it leads me to the fullness of that same thing. all the things that i have seen or that surfaced , all these things i call the in-betweeners or go-betweens are just there to spur me towards the finish line and i must be able to see that. i must not lose sight of that. the beginning, the drama, the finish line. that's how it is. i have gone through my share of drama because it has shaped my life and increased my capacity. someone taunts me all the time by saying stuff like 'shara, you and movies! you sha like drama sha'. but the truth is, i have gone through many experiences that he will never understand. and that is because rather than face the problem, he runs away from the drama altogether. i am sure there is a name for people like that and it starts with a 'c' and ends with a 'd'. LOL. i have the ...

At the very beginning, I remember the letter u sent to me. It was an indication that there was a lot of dross, a lot of filth that I as way buried beneath. Underneath all of the dirt, was where I was and I needed to be rid and well cleaned of all of that to find me. There is no way you can know yourself until you are cleansed from the dross. The unclean must eventually be clean. I had to agree first that I was covered in filth and I could see it; then I had to be ready to do whatever it took for me to be rid of it. The lord has his way of taking people through their different journeys. And this was another beginning for me. I cherished it more than the life that I was so ready to throw away. It was a blessing. Mercy on my soul. This story is not about me but about you. It is about love. It is about appreciation from me to you. I remembered all of that and more about the measures you took all so that I could become totally free from the dross. The trouble that one goes thr...